29
Mar
11

Website on a whim

I think I have an attention span problem. For as long as I can remember I have hopped from interest to interest, dabbling in all kinds of arts, ideas and projects until I drop them and move on.  I suppose it is more akin to going through crazes than ADHD. I get very struck by an idea, either one that’s been building up quietly for a while or one which is suddenly inspired, and then it unfurls so quickly in my head that I have to stop dead in my tracks for a moment or two until I start running around the house/street/town like a headless chicken trying to organise my new project. I can work happily on it for a while, totally throwing myself into the task and living every moment of it. I feel really inspired and think, “wow, I have finally found my calling in life! From now on, this is all I’m going to do!”. I sign up to forums, make expensive transactions and bang on about it non-stop to anyone who’ll listen. And then…something happens. The feeling has gone. I have no interest. The paint brushes lie crusty on my desk, the camera equipment gets pushed under my bed and the balls of wool get dragged off by the cat without me even noticing. I suppose this can make me seem like an interesting person; one minute I’m strapping a weather station to the shed in blizzard conditions and the next I am beginning a William Morris Strawberry Thief cross stitch tapestry. But for me it feels non-committal, flakey and undedicated. By flitting from craze to craze I never have time to build up many skills in each, and I’m left with a sense of failure when I spot my half finished projects and reflect on my non-existent motivation to complete them.

Whilst this may seem like a bizarre outburst to begin this website with, I’ll assure you that it does tie in with my introduction. You see, my Exciting New Idea of Today is a website. I was lying in bed this morning feeling very sorry for myself (I am off work sick) when suddenly my brain switched on and left me with this Exciting New Idea. So ignoring all the protestations of my poor tummy I ran downstairs, grabbed my laptop, jumped back into bed and started typing, typing, typing. Right now a website with all my paintings, drawings, videos, ideas, favourite books, sewing etc etc seems like the greatest epiphany yet to strike me. However, I have come to understand my mind’s fickle ways and am aware that in a few days from now my website could become just another virtual graveyard left in the purgatory of cyberspace. For this reason I am going to work on it offline for a while to see how it goes before committing to the internetz. If it proves successful then I shall upload what I have done. If it doesn’t…well, that will be for me to know, and for me to know only.

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